Ring it in

Be warned : the below muddle of thoughts has been penned down at an impossible hour and in a mushy state of mind…

Now that you insist on reading on…
The cabbie who drove me to office this morning, a very nice old man, told me a funny story.
“Back in the sixties, when I lived in a poor neighborhood, there was no much firecrackers. People used to come out in the streets and bang pots ‘n pans together.. ringing in the new year, that’s what they said. We had fun, ringing in the new year that way”
I don’t mean to be rhetorica, but this has been a very special year for me. Special in that weird way which makes you wonder and shudder all at once. Special because there is just a melee of memories, sweet and sour with just the right amount of garam masala thrown in together. Yet there is not one day that can be pulled away, held up to light, examined up close and stamped “Special”. Its exactly the dizzy feeling I get when I try to tell the leaves apart on trees that pass by as we speed away in our car. Everything looks green and pretty and exactly as it should be, but you cant tell the leaves apart.
So as we take a tentative baby step across this finish line of the year that went by, which is also the starting line for yet another journey, I cant help this old fashioned sentimental state of mind. I have realized the value of love, family and of real friends this year and I am not saying this because it’s the right thing to say. I am also watching myself in wonderment as something inside me is mellowing down inexplicably, wondering if that’s what maturity is supposed to be. I am thinking about everyone and everything that’s touched my life so far and I think I am mostly thankful (considering what a whiner I am, that’s a lot).
I have met some truly wonderful, awe inspiring people this year. They aren’t making the headlines anywhere, they are simply going about doing what they do best, in the best way possible. I have also learnt that “that’s not fair” is a ridiculous statement, because the boundaries of fair and no-fair fuse beyond recognition in the times we live. I feel unhappy about the things I have missed doing this year, like telling a friend that they meant the world to me, or calling a cousin just to say Hi. Its taken me some time to realize that none of what anyone does for us matters as much as what we can do for ourselves.
In that sense, I will always remember what the cabbie told me about the pots and pans and ringing in the new year.
No worries if there be no firecrackers… pots and pans, that’s all it takes to ring it in….
Happy new year my dearies and thank you for sticking by me in spite of everything. Hope some of those real dreams you have do come true for you this year, Amen…